finally some brief hours of sleep

                                                                                                     this is the hearts filthy lesson

I don't know what to do. I'm going through the motions, but behind there's no meaning.

 

let me laugh, let you take my pain and eat it laughing. let the freedom begin, let me sleep.

sweep me up and swallow mine eyes inside you.

be my sight again

be my dreams again and let you not fear me

darkness falling with piano deep in the shade               

chords, notes, phrases - swelling into this water what drowns me

keeps me, kills me, wants wants to die

this is what you want

 

just now

I called you and you gave me nothing. You don't ask where I am or how to reach me. You ask nothing.

I missed you too much. I shouldn't have called. I shouldn't have.

This hurts too much that you don't care.